Story Time-Elliott

Brad's youngest brother, Elliott, is one in a billion. I love his quirks and how he doesn't follow societies rules. I swear the world would be a better place if there were a few more Elliott's around. Drew posted some stories of Elliott on their blog here. He asked us to do the same. So, with love, here are some stories that always make the Roska's laugh...

Phone Conversation

Tahnie: Hi Elliott, it's Tahnie!

Elliott: Hey 'Tahn's of fun'. What's up?

Tahnie: Oh nothing much. Hey, I need to leave your Mom a message on the phone so I'm going to call back OK?

Elliott: Oh sure, no problem.

.......ring ring....

Elliott: Hello?

Tahnie: Hey Elliott it's Tahnie. I need to leave your Mom a message so don't answer the phone next time OK? I'm calling right back...

Elliott: Oh OK. Sure.

......ring ring.....

Elliott: Hello?

Tahnie: (laughing) Elliott! I need to leave your Mom a message so I'm going to call right back so I can get the answering machine.... DON'T answer the phone next time it rings OK?

Elliott: OK. Got it.

....ring ring.....

Elliott: Hello?

Tahnie: Elliott! Listen-to-me. Don't-answer-the-phone. I'm-calling-right-back-and-I-need-to-leave-your-Mom-a-message. Tell me what I just told you.

Elliott: To not answer the phone because you need to leave Mom a message.

Tahnie: Perfect. Now I'm calling right back OK? So don't answer.

Elliott: OK.

.....ring ring.....

Elliott: Hello?

Tahnie: Bud! Seriously! sigh.... Just tell your Mom I called OK?

Elliott: Yea sure.

Camping bag

I love the four things Elliott packed in his bag for a camping trip a few years back.

1. Digi Draw

2. Digi Draw (that's right he brought up a second one in case the first failed him)

3. pad of paper

4. pencil

Mission

When Brad was on his mission his companion Elder Martin loved the letter he got from Elliott so much he still has it from what I understand.

Dear Brad,

Guess what? Yup. Sock's bit me.

Love you

Brad also heard on his mission that Elliott called 911 because some kids wouldn't play with him in the neighborhood.

Prayer

Elliott was asked to give the prayer before Sunday dinner. He prayed among others things that his Dad's, "Raging indigestion" would get better. All 7 of us tried so hard to not laugh, but we couldn't help it and poor Elliott got his feelings hurt. What jerks we are!

Sandwich

Kent brought a friend home that Elliott had never met (bigger guy). They walked in the front door and Elliott looked at him and said, "You must be hungry! Let me make you a sandwich."

I had to limit it to five stories but I seriously have more. You've gotta love this kid. He's great and sweet and thoughtful and so funny!!! Great idea to write these down Drew. I hope he'll appreciate them when he gets older.

Memories of Grandpa Moon

My Grandpa Moon passed away on October 8, 2008. I was asked to speak at his funeral and tell of a few memories I had of him as a Grandchild. I wanted to share with you my talk...

Along with my sadness at Grandpa's death, I also find something to be glad about. I’m glad he is not suffering and that he is at peace. I’m glad for having known him and for the things he taught me.

Lives which have been closely tied together for 63 years cannot be separated without pain. So my thoughts today are particularly with Grandma. I hope you enjoy and find some comfort in the memories I have of Grandpa. Grandpa showed me how to be still, quiet, and gentle while he fed the birds outside in his yard. I was in awe as I watched all the chickadees and the occasional blue jay fly down from the trees and land all over his hat, shoulders and hands. One time he even let me wear his hat that he had placed bird seed on. He said I had to stand as still as a mouse so they would come to me. Some did come but they wouldn’t flock to me like they did Grandpa. Grandpa encouraged our wild imaginations from the time I was very young. One of the largest Aspen trees in his yard had a hollowed out portion at the base of it. He showed my sister, Cheri, and I and proceeded to tell us about the elves that lived in that tree. He helped us build a small mailbox right outside the hole. I don’t remember what we would write on the tiny pieces of paper, but I do remember we would anxiously wait for the elves to get our letter and send their reply. Sometimes two or three days would pass but eventually there would be a little note from the elves that lived in Grandpa’s big tree. Grandpa had a cute sense of humour and loved to tease us grand kids. Each year he would set the bear trap in his fireplace and let us know that this year he was going to catch Santa Clause and play with all of the toys. As you can imagine, we were horrified at this thought! When Easter would come around he would tell us how he was going to use that darn bear trap again and get the Easter bunny and make some good rabbit stew while he ate the candy and eggs. I also vividly remember him cautioning us about not eating the black seeds in a watermelon because if you did, you’d have watermelons growing out of your ears! I recall being very troubled and thoroughly inspecting each piece before I’d put it in my mouth. Grandpa also had a sweet tooth. You couldn’t get out of seeing Grandma and Grandpa without being offered candy or chocolates. A few years ago I made a chocolate cake for a family gathering. We took some food over to Grandma and Grandpa along with a few pieces of cake. Grandpa thoroughly enjoyed that piece of cake and happily accepted a second piece ensuring he scraped the plate clean so he got every last morsel. He didn’t eat much then so we were all happy to see his appetite even if it was for chocolate cake. These are all special memories to me and to my brother and sister and I feel honoured to be the one to share them with you. I made some of that chocolate cake today for the gathering afterward and hope you’ll have a piece….. or two and remember all the sweet things about my Grandpa. I know through prayer we can be comforted in our times of need if we but ask our Heavenly Father. I have a testimony that I will be able to see him again. Families do go on forever. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Shedding in defense

Why must my dog shed soooo much?? Seriously. Hair is all I notice lately. Vacuuming twice a week is just not cutting it. For the next two month I'm going to have to double that if I ever want to get any visitors ever again. Scratch that......I'm going to have to triple it. In fact I won't be able to get anything else done so don't ask me why I don't shower anymore, cook, converse, or leave comments on your blog...I'm vacuuming-leave me alone! We've even resorted to attacking what (few) visitors we get with our roller thing-a-ma-bob-hair-taker-off-er as they leave because we can't remember if they had pants on or not and frankly I'm concerned what the neighbors might think?!! To avoid this I guess you could check your pants at the door and we'll give you a towel to lounge around in. I don't think that's so weird. Some people make you take off your shoes...why not your pants?! Trust me, you'll thank me later as you see all the other guests line up for their roll down. I do have one theory why he must shed so much. To get back at us for letting Brynner poke, grab, sit one, drive into/over, stare at, and yank his tail...just to name a few.

I am amazed at how easy going Rusty is and maybe vacuuming for two months straight twice a year (yes, it happens in the spring as well) won't be so bad. He'll have to endure like what honey..... 3 more kids :) ?

Evidence that we do feed Rusty. Check out that booty!

12 Step Program

Update: Brynner has taken some huge steps with his toilet paper addiction and enrolled in the 12 step program! Count em up....there's 12 in there! We're so proud of our little man. Today he's 10 months and 10 days old.

Toilet Paper Sorrows

Toilet paper. Yes that's right, this entire post is about toilet paper. I'm very particular how toilet paper is put on the holder. Let me be clear....The one and only way toilet paper should be hung is so it rolls off the top and down the front. Just in case anyone is confused, I have included a correct and an incorrect illustration below. Let's just start there.

Correct

Incorrect

May I also add I have taken toilet paper for granted. Particularly the way it hung so wonderfully and so correctly there on it's little holder all those years. It was so wonderful in fact that little Brynner wanted to try it out. He only wanted to roll it once so I shared with him that, for some people, you roll it once and it's over-you're hooked-addicted. I'm sad to say he was one of those people. He just can't get enough of the rolling and the piling up and rolling again of the toilet paper. I'm trying to ease him off it so I took the first step and reversed all the toilet paper. So if he does roll it, it will make a nice little circle on itself without piling up on the floor. I know. I know. It goes against everything I thought I'd teach my child, but I just had to step in before it really became a problem. I mean, what if he started to hoard the toilet paper under his bed?! You can imagine what a dilemma that might be one day. Nothing is worse than being caught without toilet paper-nothing. I'd sacrifice anything to help my child, but I must admit when Brynner is fast asleep, I sometimes sneak into the bathroom.... and turn the toilet paper around just so I can remember how it use to be between us. None of the awkward pauses when I'd reached for it and need to stop, yet again, and remember to roll it from the back (aka: the totally wrong way of putting toilet paper on it's little holder). I know this is only a temporary fix until Brynner figures out that toilet paper can roll both backwards and forwards. When that day comes, I may gather up some friends and family and spring an intervention on him. He needs to know how his toilet paper addiction is affecting others around him. Bottom line is I don't want the same thing happening to your family. So I thought I'd quickly share how the toilet paper addiction started off so cute and innocent. He'd pull himself up by the tub in my bathroom and turn the water on and off a few hundred times while I was taking a shower or getting ready in the morning. Then one day while I was in the shower, he took my towel, threw it into the tub, and turned the water on and crawled away.

The gateway addiction

Things were never the same after that and eventually ended in toilet paper sorrows. If you're going through the same thing, I'd love to hear about it. Together we can conquer this toilet paper addiction! Thanks for listening.

Story Time-Oatmeal

I can't make a decent bowl of Oatmeal. I would stop there but it probably needs to be a documented and proven fact for you to believe me. That, or Brynner and Rusty both hate oatmeal which is practically impossible in every way. Our dog will eat anything. Well that's not entirely true. He won't eat two things...and I can only think of one thing right now-olives. So back to the fact that I can't make oatmeal.

A couple weeks ago I made Brynner some strawberries and cream instant oatmeal. Yes it was the instant kind, the kind with sugared dehydrated strawberries in it and I happen to love it. I put in the 1/2 cup recommend amount of water. Pop it into the microwave (Not to go off on a tangent or anything but I think I've watched Sandra Lee WAY too much for one life time. Does it bug anyone else how often she uses the word Pop?! Makes me insane and there I go and use it!) for the recommended minute and wait. I can see the deliciousness bubbling up through the microwave window. It beeps. I take it out. I realize it's probably the same temperature as liquid lava. I put it in the freezer. I wait. The only problem is Brynner doesn't want to wait any longer. So I start to jump up and down in my PJ's singing Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree as animated and loud (with full blown hand actions) as I could. After the third round and a little Itsy Bitsy Spider thrown in the mix the oatmeal had finally cooled down enough and this is kind of how it went down.

Me: Mmmmm...Strawberry Oatmeal...

Brynner: Gag

Me: You OK buddy? Here's some more! Hmmm... Oatmeal!

Brynner: Dry heave

Me: My gosh are you OK? Do you have something in your mouth? Let Mama see....what's in there? .... Nothing, try again. Hmmmm...Strawberry Oatmeal!

Brynner: Gag. Gag. Dry Heave

Me: OK maybe you don't like this kind. We'll try another day.

A week later....

Me: Hmmmm....Cinnamon Oatmeal!!!!

Brynner: Dry Heave

Me: See look, Mommy will take a bite!! Hmmmm...Oatmeal!!! Your turn!!

Brynner: Gag. Throw up.

Me: Oh No! Sorry baby, no more oatmeal I promise!

What do I do next? Scoop the left over yummy oatmeal that suddenly doesn't look that yummy, into Rusty's bowl. And it kind of went down like this...

Me: Hmmm....Oatmeal!!! (Scrape, Scrape).

Rusty: chomp, slurp, inhale....... Gag. Gag. Dry Heave. Throw up.

Me: You've got to be kidding me!!!!!!!!! My oatmeal is NOT THAT BAD!!!

So it's now documented and proven that I shouldn't be allowed to make oatmeal. My dog who will not eat olives and one other thing I can't remember; now won't eat olives, one other thing I can't remember, AND my Oatmeal. Sigh...